I see two ways in which the thermal de Broglie wavelength is defined. In both cases we can get it from the probability distribution and partition function of an ideal gas. We will consider a 3D ideal gas with non-relativistic dispersion.
First Way
Consider the partion function of an ideal gas:
\begin{align}
Z &= \int_{p_x=-\infty}^{+\infty}\int_{p_y=-\infty}^{+\infty}\int_{p_z=-\infty}^{+\infty} e^{-\frac{1}{2mkT}(p_x^2+p_y^2+p_z^2)}dp_xdp_ydp_z\\
&= \left(2\pi mkT \right)^{\frac{3}{2}}
\end{align}
Note that this has dimensions of momentum cubed. Noticing this, we can define the characteristic thermal momentum
\begin{align}
p_T = \sqrt{2\pi mkT}
\end{align}
We can consider the de Broglie wavelength of a particle with this characteristic momentum to get the first definition of the thermal de Broglie wavelength:
$$\lambda_T = \frac{h}{p_T} = \frac{h}{\sqrt{2\pi mkT}}$$
Second Way
Consider the average energy of an ideal 3D gas. This can be found from the equipartion theorem to be
\begin{align}
\langle E \rangle = \frac{3}{2}kT
\end{align}
A relation for the de Broglie wavelength is
$$
\lambda = \frac{h}{\sqrt{2mE}}
$$
Considering the de Broglie wavelength of a particle with energy equal to the average thermal energy of a 3D ideal gas we get the second definition of the thermal de Broglie wavelength:
$$
\lambda_T = \frac{h}{\sqrt{3mkT}}
$$
A Note on a Possible Third Way
A third way which would make sense would be to calculate the average de Broglie wavelength of all of the particles in an ideal gas:
$$
\langle \lambda \rangle = \iiint \frac{h}{p} e^{-p^2/2mkT} dp^3 = \frac{2h}{\sqrt{2\pi m kT}}
$$
We see that this is within a factor of 2 of the first definition.
Summary
The three approaches differ by factors of order unity so they all refer to similar length scales. In the end the thermal de Broglie wavelength is largely a notational convenience so we don't need to carry around factors of $\frac{h^2}{mkT}$ all over the place so we shouldn't worry too much about the pre-factor. But it is nice to know where the different conventions come from. Though it is largely a notational convenience it does clearly have physical significance since it is related to $\langle \lambda \rangle$.
I have never really seen the third way presented. I have seen the first way presented by far the most often. I think this is because the partition function appears all over the place so very commonly the specific factor $2\pi mkT$ arises so it is nice to give this quantity a name. The second approach may be presented more often in introductory approaches to statistical mechanics. This convention is most problematic because it very clearly relies on the specific problem of a 3 dimensional ideal gas.
Thinking about this answer:
$$KE(rel)=(\gamma-1)mc^2$$
Thus, if T=KE(rel):
$$\gamma=1+T/mc^2$$
If $T>>2mc^2>mc^2$:
$$\gamma\approx T/mc^2$$
By the other hand, from the de Broglie fundamental relationship:
$$\lambda=\dfrac{h}{p}=\dfrac{hc}{pc}=\dfrac{hc}{m\gamma v c}$$
and then, with $\gamma\approx T/mc^2$, and $v\approx c$ we obtain
$$\lambda=\dfrac{h mc^3}{m T v c}=\dfrac{h c}{T}$$
From this last equation we get the above one from a simple use of the dispersion relationship. However, as the kinetic energy is much bigger than the rest mass, my doubt concerning the presence of mass remained...Until I did some numbers...
Best Answer
Average kinetic energy of an atom is $$\frac{3}{2}k_B T$$ de-Broglie wave is not an arbitrary wave function $\psi$, but a plane wave with energy $$ E=\hbar\omega=\frac{\hbar^2 k^2}{2m},$$ where $k=\frac{2\pi}{\lambda}$ is the wave vector. Thus, the definition requires us to equate these quantities: $$ \frac{3}{2}k_B T = \frac{\hbar^2 k^2}{2m} = \frac{h^2}{2m\lambda^2} \Rightarrow \lambda=...$$
Rough size of atom
Note that here we treat an atom as a point-like particle, described by a De-Broglie wave. That is, the wave function here is for the overall motion of the atomic center-of-mass, rather than for an inner state of an atom, which is extensively discussed in QM books. This might be a possible source of confusion. Thus, what is meant here by the size of atom is not the size of the electronic cloud around the nucleus, but rather the extension of the wave packet in space.