I'd second Mapperz suggestion of the Revo-Unistaller, as with the defunct COM Explorer, the freeware version will get the job done. But the Pro version gets routinely updated and while it will work in trial mode, it is such a useful tool you should probably purchase it to have available. http://www.revouninstaller.com/download-professional-version.php
If the 3rd party extensions with ArcGIS version dependencies that you are interested in removing laid down registry entries correctly you should be able to track the components manually in the registry edits.
Do a registry backup first and then start by disabling any orphaned services from the extensions.
I'd start looking the HKLM\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\Uninstall
You want the Product Code CSLIDs listed as Product Code or in the UnistallString, and make a note of any other associated CSLIDs
If the package install was MSI based try to uninstall with the indicated msiexec /x for the Product Code's CSLID. If the installer is intact--everything should come off cleanly.
If extension was not MSI based, see if installer executable is intact and when executed has an uninstall option and run it.
Unfortunately, if either installer is corrupted (missing components from the extension or from the ArcGIS uninstall/upgrade) you'll only achieve a partial removal and with the list of CSLIDs you'll need to chase things down manually in the registry and the file system and doing deletions as you go.
The Revo-Unistaller reliably automates most of this.
This is a licensing issue. A standalone ArcEngine license does not support multi-user editing. According to ESRI's documentation, multi-user editing geodatabase functionality only exists for ArcGIS Server licensing.
Since you have tagged this question with ArcGIS Server, I am going to assume that you have an ArcGIS server license. What you need to do is ensure that both you and your users have the ArcGIS Geodatabase Update Extension installed. You need this to create a multi-user geodatabase and also to enable multi-user editing.
1. If you haven't yet verified that the geodatabase you are working with is actually a multi-user database, check this. If it isn't a MU Geodatabase follow this guide (essentially just create an empty multi-user geodatabase and import all your single-user geodatabase information into it).
2. Verify that all users have the necessary geodatabase update extension mentioned above installed on their computer.
Best Answer
This ESRI web site (link) provides various versions of the identify command (code samples in VB) that you may use as a starting template for your custom tool.